7 Badasses Who Kicked Death In The Balls!!!

How would you react to being dropped out of a plane without a parachute, or buried alive? After crapping your pants, that is.

These people survived all of that and more, slapping Death in the face and telling it to go make them a sandwich.

7. Vesna Vulovic survives a 33,000 feet fall from an airplane.


On January 26, 1972, stewardess Vesna Vulovic was working an extra shift due to a technical error. She ended up taking the shift anyway, r. Now this itself would be painful but guess what? The mountain was stone cold frozen. So after falling into a coma, this total badass wakes up… and asks for a cigarette!


Vesna was paralyzed on her left side but continued to walk through sheer determination and truckloads of effort. She continued to fly and also got a Guinness World Record for any Highest fall survived without parachute. Now that’s BADASS!!!

6. Aron Ralston chops off his own arm.


So Aron goes off to take a nice, peaceful hike in the woods and he comes out, not missing a packet of chips stolen by a bear, but HIS ARM.

When Aron went mountain climbing, a boulder fell on him, pinning his arm. When the rock didn’t budge for five whole days, he realized that he needed to say goodbye to his arm if he wanted the rest of his body back.

VIDEO: Aron Ralston describes amputating his own arm that was caught under a boulder

So first he broke his arm by snapping it against the same rock. Then he took out his multi-use tool. This is the part where readers with weak hearts can probably close this window and open up a Calvin and Hobbes cartoon. So, back to the story. The piece of equipment was a fake so Aron had to cut through his flesh piercing it over and over again. Then he used pliers to cut through the tendons that the knife couldn’t handle. You can hear him describe how the flesh on his arm started rotting by the time he got free.

Check out other badasses in next page…

5. Jim Thompson – Badass Prisoner of War


During the Vietnam War, Jim was captured and held as a prisoner of war for nine years, at which time he was beaten to a pulp and tortured more than anyone’s ex-wife ever could.

His plane was shot down in 1964, wherein Jim broke his back and took a bullet, but not necessarily in that order. After his capture, Jim was held in a jungle camp, and not the cute kind where giraffes chew grass from your hands. He was slammed into a wooden cage too small for him to move and his captors asked him to sign papers stating that he was well looked after. After sessions of torture, Jim finally caved and signed.

james-thompson-pow-1He was moved into solitary confinement for four years and suffered a heart seizure. A prisoner next door saw Jim and thought that a corpse had been placed. But death didn’t win this round, no siree! Jim was finally released in 1973 and lived 30 years to tell his horrific tale.

4. Poon Lim – Survived on bird blood and hunted sharks


For Poon Lim, a steward on a British Ship during World War II, his life was almost like a Life of Pi situation. A ship he was working on was blown up by the Germans when it was far, far away from land. Poon survived, climbed onto a life raft and hung in there till he was rescued 133 days later.


At first there were biscuits and water in the raft but those ran out pretty fast. Poon started catching sharks, drinking bird blood and battled sunburn, seasickness and storms. He even caught a shark and fed on its meat for days. Poon drifted near Brazil and was finally rescued by fishermen.

3. Meng Xianchen & Meng Xianyou – Ate coal for breakfast, lunch and dinner

Brothers who beat the odds ... Meng Xianchenm, right, and Meng Xianyou.
Brothers who beat the odds … Meng Xianchenm, right, and Meng Xianyou.

Meng Xianchen & Meng Xianyou were hard at work in a coal mine when the tunnel they were working in collapsed, burying them beneath it. A rescue team was sent to dig the brothers out but they soon gave up. A few fellow miners gave it a shot but they were promptly arrested lest they manage to dig up some coal along with the humans trapped under it.

Meng Xianchen-Meng Xianyou-1

The Mengs’ relatives gave up all hope and even conducted funeral rites. However, the brothers stared death in the face and started digging themselves out. With one pickaxe and four hands, they dug their way through 66 feet of coal. Oh and they also ate coal for breakfast, lunch and dinner. They say when you’re starving, coal tastes delicious. Let’s just take their word on it, shall we?

Anyway, the Mengs’ got out of the tunnel and gave the officials who called off the rescue, the finger. They promptly went to the hospital and crapped out coal for the next few days.

2. Brent Case Has Bear-Proof Skin


Brent Case was a surveyor working in the forests of British Columbia when a 900-pound adult grizzly bear decided to say hey. Though Brent was carrying an ax the time, he decided to play dead. The bear started munching on Brent’s skull, threw him into a bog and jumped on him like a WWE-wrestler before leaving him alone.

Now Brent was smart to play dead cause’ according to bro code, sorry bear code, bears don’t eat already-dead humans. Anyway, Brent picked himself up and with this scalp hanging out from his skin and bleeding heavily, went for help.

1. Alexis Goggins – Small Superhero


Alexis Goggins, a little seven year old saved her mom from her insanely psychotic boyfriend. The slug kidnapped Alexis and her mom. They managed to call 911 but the cops couldn’t send anyone right away, probably cuz’ they were too busy eating doughnuts.

So the mom’s boyfriend starts shooting and two bullets struck the mother. Little Alexis jumped in front of her mother and took six bullets. Finally, the cops arrived.

Now this is the kinda injury that would have made even superman die about three times. But not little Alexis, no. She escaped death like a BOSS.

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Written by Sarah Rogers

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